East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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