The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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