Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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