We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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