TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
