OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
