found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Let's paint friendship bongs
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
