Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
