There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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