new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you didnt know i had herpes?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
