I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
