He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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