At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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