She's JV to your varsity
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
What a dumb baby whore.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
