I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
