Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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