my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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