Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
and she was petting her beer can
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
