So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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