Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
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