the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
