after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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