So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize