I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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