omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
