I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
