honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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