Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
