not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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