i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Randomize
