I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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