so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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