Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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