Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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