I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
