we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
