I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
whose ass print is on the piano?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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