You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
