I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize