"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize
