Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Randomize
