The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Randomize
