guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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