end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Randomize
