I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Randomize
