Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
