I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Why are your pants in the freezer?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
