its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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