I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
