Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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